Joey

I go to school in the Nebraska plains, which makes sense because my life is just as exciting.

I'm 22, and if it weren't for my friends here my life would be even more boring. I'm over this part of my life and ready for the adventure, but for now I have to sit and wait.

 

Josh: The best part about working at the gas station is that if I stand in this one spot, I can look in the window and see my beard.

Needed this reminder, apparently...

Josh: You deserve to sit in the comfy spot. You're the only one who doesn't have anyone to cuddle with.

Josh: I've had beer.

Me: So that's why you can't get your shoes off...

Josh: Is Tim (my roommate) or Andrew (Josh's roommate) here?

Me: Tim is here.

Josh: Don't tell him I've had beer. *puts paper bag on his head*

Josh (walks out of his room with a comb stuck in his beard): If you grow a fro on your head and stick a pick in it, I'll grow a fro on my chin. *Giggles*

Me: Deal!

Josh (playing Skyrim): Look out! Me and my Ebony War Axe comin' up your ass!

Josh (playing skyrim): It's the 4th of Frostfall! That's a cute name for a month. 'IT'S THE 4TH OF FROSTFALL!

Josh, still: I'm the map, I'm the map! Backpack, backpack!

Josh...still: I'M AN ORC. I SMELL LIKE BLOOD.

Josh, again: It's a bear. Hi bear.

Josh: Can I invent the phrase "No hobo?"

Me: Yes.

Josh: Good. Because it's funny. It sounds like "No homo," but it's "No hobo."

My flatmate Josh: Are you having a good day?

Me: Yeah! I have a dreidel!

Josh: Oh! That's funny, because you're a Jew!

Me: Yes.

Josh: It's probably a good thing you're not really a Jew. I don't think people would be friends with you.